Saturday, July 19, 2014

Final Post

            Casey and John never married due to John’s immature reaction to finding out Casey was pregnant. His emotional immaturity caused him to distance himself from Casey. John felt totally overwhelmed at the prospect of marriage and raising a child. As much as he liked Casey, he was scared and could not deal with that kind of responsibility. John subsequently moved into a different group home. Casey gave birth to a 6.2oz baby boy named Matthew. Casey was adamant about keeping her baby and rejected the idea of giving him up for adoption. Given Sarah’s feelings of regret after giving up her son for adoption, she offered to help Casey raise Matthew. At least this time her financial situation made it possible to provide for a child. In a way, Sarah was making up for what she couldn’t have given her own son. Matthew grew up in Sarah’s home, and Casey spent time with him after work and on weekends. Sarah had arranged for child care while she was at work.  During the time they were together, Sarah taught Casey how to care for Matthew. Casey would return to the group home after putting Matthew to bed. On occasion, Casey would spend the weekend with her mother and Matthew. Casey continued to work but had to get another job at a different restaurant when the first one closed.

            Casey’s experiences as a mother promoted an increase in her emotional maturity. She was less self centered and demonstrated concern and empathy for others. She had learned to cook and kept herself and her living area neat and clean. Although Casey’s mental age was far below her chronological age of 40, she had made significant gains both socially and emotionally. Casey had become a productive member of society. She had succeeded in holding down a job and was able to use functional academics in her daily life. She had reached the level of functioning which professionals strive for when working with people like Casey.  With Sarah’s help, she was able to raise her child. Casey was able to provide Matthew with love and attend to many of his physical needs, but lacked the intellectual abilities to stimulate him mentally as he grew older. It was Sarah who had to supplement the mental stimulation that Casey could not provide to Matthew.  In addition, Matthew was enrolled in a nursery school program for added stimulation and socialization with peers. The first five years are crucial to the development of a child’s brain.

            Sarah was almost 60 and still employed as a dental hygienist. She often thought about her son and wondered if she’d ever see him. Casey’s son helped to fill the void left after giving her son up for adoption. Sarah never stopped sending cards and gifts for his birthday and holidays. The adoptive parents continued sending pictures but not as often or as many since he became a teenager. When Sarah turned 65, she received a long awaited communication from her son who had asked to meet with her. Sarah was thrilled and extremely nervous about meeting him. When the day came, her son appeared at her door with flowers. Sarah took the flowers in one hand, hugged him, kissed him and proceeded to cry. He returned the hug and kisses as the tears rolled down his face. They talked for hours. Sarah explained the circumstances surrounding his birth and her reasons for giving him up for adoption. She told him about his father, his sister, and his nephew. Casey and Matthew came over and got to meet him as well.  He had been given the name Brian, and was attending graduate school in order to get an MBA. He spoke lovingly about his adoptive parents. Speaking with Sarah and meeting Casey helped Brian better understand what led to his being put up for adoption. He was grateful to Sarah for all the cards and gifts as well as making it easy for him to find her. As Brian left, he agreed to keep in touch and gave a big hug to Sarah, Casey, and Matthew.        

Casey had turned 50 when she was diagnosed with breast cancer. Matthew was now 15 and attending high school. He was a bright boy and understood about his mother’s disability. He was quite upset when he learned that Casey had cancer.  Sarah was devastated when she found out. Casey had to have a mastectomy and underwent chemotherapy. During this time, Casey stayed with her mother. Sarah was retired and collecting social security. She also had an annuity from a 401K that she started when she began working for the dentist. Casey had Medicaid and received SSI given her disability. Casey also saved money from her salary at the restaurants at which she worked. Casey’s illness was affecting her attendance at work. She had used her sick leave for her surgery, but the time she missed because of the side effects from the chemo was deducted from her pay.  Casey was able to manage with Sarah’s help. Matthew had a part time job and was also able to contribute financially.

After Casey finished chemo, she was back to work on a consistent basis and no longer needed to stay with Sarah. Matthew graduated high school and received a full tuition scholarship based on need and academic performance. Casey was back in the group home and feeling more like herself. Cancer patients’ survival rate increases if they remain cancer free for at least 5 years.  Percentages change, depending on the stage of cancer at diagnosis. Casey’s was stage 2 so her chances were 93%. When Casey was 56, Matthew graduated college. She and Sarah were attending the graduation exercises. It was a proud and joyous day for Casey and Sarah. During the graduation exercises, Casey complained of a deep chest pain. They said nothing to Matthew in an effort not to ruin his day. The next day, Casey saw her doctor who recommended a chest x-ray. When the results came back, they were inconclusive, so Casey was sent for a CAT scan.  Once the results were in, the news wasn’t good. The cancer had metastasized to her breast bone. Sarah and Casey wept. The prognosis was not good. The doctor recommended radiation therapy to shrink the tumor in the bone and suggested another treatment of chemotherapy. He felt this was the only option at this point, if there was to be any hope of arresting Casey’s cancer.



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